new poems and reviews by Kevin Higgins

by hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm - mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Thu Jul 06, 2006 23:57

did he pass the leaving cert unseen poem test?

by Ann Fri Jul 07, 2006 01:47

What are the relevant qualifications for reviewing poetry?

by hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Fri Jul 07, 2006 03:05

For starters. Surely you haven't forgotten the unseen poem ?
Hopeful future poet reviewers faced this poem only last month in the Leaving Cert :-

The Toy Horse

someone when I was young, stole my toy horse,
The charm of my morning romps, my man's delight.
For two days I grieved, holding the sorrow like flowers
Between the bars of my sullen angry mind.

Next day I went out with evil in my heart,
Evil between my eyes and at the tips of my hands,
Looking for my enemy at the armed stations,
Until I found him, playing in his garden

With my toy horse, urgent in the battle
Against the enemeies of his Unreason's land:
He was so happy, I gave him also
My Vivid coloured caryons and my big glass marble.

Valentin Iremonger (1918 - )

http://www.examinations.ie/archive/exampapers/2006/LC00...V.pdf

Once you can read that & review it, you'll need to get the clothes right as well. Floppy hats, heavy jewelry, silk cravattes go very down well if you're reviewing poetry on the TV, but of course you could be as buck naked as anti-papist if you're just doing an internet or wireless review, but there's substantially less money in that, & more often than not the sort of people who offer you cyberspace to review poetry take advantage of you (copyleft I think it's called or some other mallarky).

You can never think anyone with a big beard is a thickie, so a big beard helps as only intelligent people get review poetry. You've also got to be completely au fait with the common expression of praise, gushing adulation & thinly veiled sarcasm. Nobody gets away with a review like this anymore "I thought the assonance was aesthetically pleasing and the imagery uplifting till the last line with its lost spondee really jolting me back to the work in hand". You've got to practise!
& practise lots! Lastly never trust a poet to review poetry, they're a jealous lot and awfully political in their machinations only outdone by druids indeed.